Are You Madly In Love
By: Michael Douglas
THE next time you want to proclaim from the rooftop that you are madly in, love with sexy Suzie next door, please be informed that the insanity bug has really bitten you. No, not just because you want to do a moonwalk 60 feet above the ground, but because research suggests so.
A study in Italy indicates that people who have recently fallen in love have some of the symptoms of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD). That would explain why you are so obsessed with the love of your life that you have to call him/her on an hourly basis, SMS love texts relentlessly and spend every waking hour (and some sleeping ones too) dreaming about the person!
The study comes to this conclusion as one symptom of OCD appears to be unusually low levels of the neurotransmitter serotonin, which has been associated with anxiety and depression. Students who participated in the study and claimed to have fallen in love recently were found to have serotonin levels 40 per cent lower than their peers. No wonder than that people in this love struck phase swoon at the very mention of their beloved’s name!
To know that someone is so completely obsessed with you that all sense of reason has deserted him or her is the ultimate high. Unfortunately, (or perhaps fortunately as you may not like being hounded by mushy calls 24X7) this obsessive phase doesn’t last forever. The biochemical effect of falling in love is just temporary. Reports suggest that this euphoric feeling lasts little more than a year!
According to report co-author, Piergluigi Politi, after that, acute love transforms into a more stable feeling as romantic love seems to take a backseat. The first flush really doesn’t last beyond a year. One really can’t be on a nor-epinephrine or dopamine high all the time!
As our hormones and neurotransmitters regain their balance, so does our sense of sanity. The obsessive and have-to-see-your-face-everyday love is soon replaced with a more mature and understanding emotion, which is still love, only a more steady and secure version of it. And this love can last a lifetime.
Social psychiatrist and psychologist Seema Hingorrany believes that love can be eternal, provided we follow certain norms and adhere to some definite rules. “Love has phases, like, excitement, arguments, companionship and finally stability. And each phase comes with its guidelines. Follow those, and love can be as long-lasting as you’d want it to be,” she says, and adds, “Things like sufficient space, no ego hassles, basic compatibility, not being too judgemental, refraining from an overdose of mushiness etc. do have an important role to play in securing undying love.”
So what happens when one partner strays? Does that mean that the love has died? “No,” she answers, “That just means that the person is attracted elsewhere as perhaps the basic foundation of your relationship wasn’t strong. And if it is indeed real love, then the person will return and try to make the union work.”
There’s hope yet for the eternal romantics. Maybe a trip to the rooftop to proclaim your love isn’t such a bad idea, after all…
BE FOREVER IN lOVE!
Talk time: Passion is temporary, conversation eternal. Find new things to talk about daily, even if it is just reporting your day.
Go fly: Take a trip together, whether for a night, a weekend or a week - it will breathe new life into your relationship, as well as test the waters by forcing you out of your ’safe’ environment.
Make love: Rather self-explanatory. Sex up the between the sheets activity to keep genuine affection alive.
Date: Set a time each week or each month for an official date. Relive your courtship days.
Space saga: Stop living in each other’s pockets. Plan a trip for yourself, read alone, go solo shopping, or just sleep. By the end of it, you may find that you look forward to seeing your partner even more!
Compliment each other: Especially if your love is a woman! A favourable mention of one’s smile or hair or outfit or figure will create much happiness.
Michael Douglas is a relationship expert and he writes for Love-Lectures.com where he deals with all love problems and relationship issues to unlock the secrets to building healthy and successful relationships. Also he provides free romantic tips to spice up your love life and relationships.