Step 8 To An Ideal Relationship: Don’t Play The Victim
By: Nick Arrizza, M.D.
In my recent article “Ten Steps To An Ideal Relationship” Step 8 advocated that one not act like a victim and not attempt to rescue victim like behaviors.
Relationships are often sought out consciously or unconsciously by immature needy individuals who then take on a victim role in order to manipulate others into rescuing or caring for them. This is irresponsible behavior which undermines some of the principles I mentioned in my earlier article. When one engages or attempts to rescue victim like behaviors this fractures the trust in a relationship and irreversibly destroys it.
What does it mean to play the victim in a relationship?
Well it means some or all of the following:
1. Not to carry one’s fair share of the combined responsibilities that a relationship entails.
2. To let one’s partner off the hook for not carrying their fair share of responsibilities.
3. To not look after one’s emotional, mental, physical and spiritual health.
4. To not continue one’s personal growth.
5. To isolate one’s self in the relationship.
6. To use the partner as a way of interfacing with life and one’s societal and career responsibilities.
7. To engage in passive aggressive manipulative behaviors.
And so on.
As you can see much of this is a sign of an individual whose EMQ (Emotional Maturity Quotient: please see my article here on EMQ and assess yourself) is low and who is in need of some help.
If you or your partner falls into the category of victim consciousness I would like you to know that this can be an intractable problem if not addressed in an effective manner.
Clear evidence of this is the fact that most individuals who are drawn to being a victim often hold onto such identification because they “think” that it serves them in some positive way.
This is absolutely false, yet despite its destructive effects on that person’s life they often tenaciously hang onto it.
In either case you don’t have to be a victim of your partner’s victim complex. If you want to be free kindly visit the link below and set up an introductory consultation.
Dr. Nick Arrizza is trained in Chemical Engineering, Business Management & Leadership, Medicine and Psychiatry. He is an Energy Psychiatrist, Healer, Key Note Speaker,Editor of a New Ezine Called “Spirituality And Science” (which is requesting high quality article submissions) Author of “Esteem for the Self: A Manual for Personal Transformation” (available in ebook format on his web site), Stress Management Coach, Peak Performance Coach & Energy Medicine Researcher, Specializes in Life and Executive Performance Coaching, is the Developer of a powerful new tool called the Mind Resonance Process(TM) that helps build physical, emotional, mental and spiritual well being by helping to permanently release negative beliefs, emotions, perceptions and memories. He holds live workshops, international telephone coaching sessions and international teleconference workshops on Physical. Emotional, Mental and Spiritual Well Being.
Web site: http://www.telecoaching4u.com/IntroConsult.htm