Understanding Dating Violence
By: Ron Zvagelsky
It is important to realize that people who are inclined to domestic or dating violence will not show it in the first few dates. There are warning signs you will want to look for, and when you see them, you will want to stop dating the person immediately, no matter how much you’re attracted to the person. All of the warning signs can be defined in one word, and this word is “control.”
If you are dating someone who gives the impression that they always want to be in control, this may be a bad sign. Those who are violent need to have power over their victims. While dating violence can be connected to both genders, it is commonly inflicted on women by the men who date them. However, women can display violent tendencies as well. If you notice that your partner is abnormally jealous of other people such as your family or friends, this is a bad sign. You will also want to watch for dating partners who say “you belong to them.” While this may be harmless, be wary of someone who actually sees you as being their property.
You will also want to watch for dating partners who get angry because they tried to call you, but were unable to reach you. These people will typically want to know exactly where you were, or what you were doing. When it comes to anger, how does you partner rank? Are they constantly upset about something? If the answer to this question is yes, you should seriously evaluate whether or not you should continue dating them. Women will want to watch for men who tell them not to dress up or shave when they are dating. In addition to this, when you say “no,” does your partner listen immediately, or do you have to repeat yourself?
Dating violence is a serious issue that you will not want to take lightly. As you read this article, think about the person you’re dating. If these things describe them, you are putting yourself in a potentially dangerous situation. When you are dating, think carefully about the person you are with. If you seen bad signs, do not ignore them, and avoid thinking you can change them. People who have abusive tendencies will generally display them for the rest of their lives.
Ron Zvagelsky has a degree in Business Administration from the University of Southern California. He graduated Magna Cum Laude in May 2006. He is currently the Chief Executive Officer of PlanJam – where you can find fun date ideas and romantic date ideas.